I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
