I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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