Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Sorry about my life...
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
