I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
