is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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