we're blogging at a bar
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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