I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize