she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
