i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
