how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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