Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
