So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
