If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
