I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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