yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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