just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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