is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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