she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
well you can't waste a boner
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
