If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
