awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
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