I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
