I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
