He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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