so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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