i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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