I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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