y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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