Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just invented taco cereal.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
