the day after is always just damage control
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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