ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
