it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
