hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
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