Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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