remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
