I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
