I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
