are you so shy because you have an std?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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