i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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