yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
