Tell her she can't have a vagina
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize