Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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