I am puke
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
