I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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