One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
