I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We left the knife in your bed.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
