my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
