Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
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