yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
