omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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