hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
